Happy June everyone!
My youngest turns 1 tomorrow so we will be doing the stereotypical "give the baby a cake & let him smash it up". So that will be my excitement for the weekend.
By here's my take of the movies coming out this weekend that I can't see, but you may want to...or maybe see Avengers again....
Before I get started, I want to show my grading scale:
-Run! Go See It!
-Meh, Other Movies Are Sold Out
-Get/Rent On DVD
-Wait For Netflix
-PASS It Up For Your Own Sanity
-Snow White & The Huntsman
Or.. Bella & Thor.
Where do I begin? This being the biggest movie this weekend, but I feel very confident that both MIB3 and The Avengers will out earn this thing. The trailer I have been bombarded with on tv (never made it a goal to look up and watch) looks like it was directed in a style similar of Guillermo del Toro. It's dark, has monsters, great effects, it even has 7 dwarfs (I was blown away when I saw the cast for the tiny men)! I think the world of Charlize Theron, and have been impressed by Chris Hemsworth in his 2 rolls as the god of thunder......but here's the thing no-one is talking about: Close your eye's and think about this- You're taking a poop, just sitting there, starring at the wall, it's a good poop, no straining, easy going, but still it's just you and your thoughts. Now think of the face you are making... not mad, or happy.. very empty minded.. expressionless. That is the acting style and face of Kristen Stewart.. all the time.. never ending. Like a bored cat.
I think the folks in marketing knew this, that's why you see Chris and Charlize more in the trailers then ol' stoneface.
Based on what I know, I say PASS unless you're one of those stupid teen-aged girls who love Twilight and needs more Robo-Bella McColdeyes.
-Battlefield America
Oh look! Another misfit bunch of kids dancing! We haven't seen this about 1,000 times before!! Seriously, who goes to watch these things, and why are they taking up valuable screen time when you could watch Hunger Games, or Think Like A Man again? I think these movies are trying to out print the Air Bud films.
PASS by this one while trying not to inhale the cloud of AXE spray from within.
-Piranha 3DD
What?!? Noooo Why would some of my fav actors take part in a piece of shit like this? Ving Rhames, Christopher Lloyd, and .... well, The Hoff is in it too so that feels about right. Unreal that this is a sequel, and they got Gary Busey... well, again... what else is he doing?
And what are you doing going into this bloody shit stain? Netflix the bitch!
-Final word:
These are the main events coming out along with 4 low budget flicks in limited release. If I had to watch any of these it would be Piranha 3DD only because it knows what kind of movie it should be, and does live up to it's over-hyped, over-sexed, over-gore and it would have the worst spoilers (the fish eat people! oops!) The other 2 are complete pass ups, but Piranha 3DD would make a good guilty free Netflix viewing.
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